Forget it. I planned to do a vibrant update to bring DeadMansHonda into 2009, but it doesn't come out right. Ever.

A few months ago I sat with friends I hadn't seen in ages but whom I really love and enjoy. They are those rare souls who energize you with their very presence. Who pick you up right where you left off and leave you in a better place than you were when you started.

"So," they asked, "What's new with you? What's been going on?"

"Oohhh...." I fumbled around, rapping my fingers on the table. I looked around the ornate Thai restaurant. "Not..not much."

"Well how is the studio?" they asked me, knowing where I had worked before.

"I don't work there anymore," I said, dreadfully aware of the fact that I would need to explain.

"How did you even end up there in the first place? It never seemed like you," said S, shaking his head. Yeah. It wasn't like me. I may live near Hollywood, but I am not the type to care about it in the least.

"The job fell into my lap right after grad school. Then I tried getting a job with the government," I scrunched my face before trying to couch the next bit in the most normal sounding way, "and that turned out really weird." Kabloom. My "couching" just made me sound like a thirteen year old describing pop rocks. "But I left the studio to go work as a manager at That Company, and well, my boss..."

S and N kept watching with polite, open eyes.

"Was breaking lots of....laws. Big ones. So I'm no longer there." I said as clumsily as I had relayed everything else.

"What happened to that guy you were dating?" I tried to think of who they meant. Oh.

"Yeah, he came back from living abroad and proposed marriage but...in a very factual...manner...he...went to a library, read about inter-faith marriages, and changed his mind a week later. He wasn't comfortable with my faith," I flashed a half-annoyed smile. "But I'm dating another guy-- he's fantastic. Although I haven't met his parents yet. They aren't keen on the fact that I'm...white."

"Really?" they asked.

Yeah. Really. Fun.

"How is that little girl you brought up with you to camp?" N asked me, her gorgeous face sweet and eager to listen.

"Her mother and her mother's girlfriend took her up north in February and wouldn't tell me where they were going...Little D called me on mother's day, and we chat on email occasionally, but otherwise I don't know where she is and haven't been able to find her."

S and N looked sad.

"That's too bad...you were so close..."

I nodded. Losing her was probably the most painful, to be honest. But I didn't mention that.

"Ok, well how are your parents?" S asked me.

"Uumm...my mom left my dad over the summer. And took most of the furniture with her-- you should see the place. We're thinking of putting in a bowling alley." My attempt at humor didn't seem to work. S's mouth dropped open.

"Are you serious? What the? You've gotta be kidding me...L, are you ok?" He asked me with the most genuine concern. I was touched.

"Yeah..." offered N, who had been through quite a lot of junk herself over the last few years. "That's awful."

I laughed. "Well not as bad as the fact that before that..."

I was about to relay more information, but I decided that was just going to make the situation more and more and awkward so I finally shut my mouth. These friends are funny and smart, and faithful, so I didn't want to miss out on what they had to share. And I was not disappointed.

When I left hanging out with them my stomach hurt from laughing-- their stories are hilarious beyond belief. But I also hurt a little realizing I am so different from the kid S met when we were in high school. And the friend N met when we were just in our second year of college.

When I got home I accidentally used nail polish remover (thinking it was astringent) on my face and couldn't figure out why it was burning so.

And then I realized:

Maybe my life is just different. I'm as nuts as ever.