After walking nine blocks back and forth along Lankershim in NoHo, sweat beading in between my shoulder blades from the hot evening, I finally found the gallery. A student's mother was debuting her play tonight, in a small gathering of critical artists from the area. And me. Not a critical artist.

While fixated on a painting above the stage of what appeared to be seven breasts on one woman with manly thighs coming directly out of the sternum, I failed to notice the fellow who sat down beside me.

"Hello. What is your name?" He said with an accent. "I am afraid of die girlz."

I smiled, shook his hand and told him my name.

"What's your name?" I asked.

"I am the Messiah."

Trying not the appear as though I was thinking 'what the haeyl', I glanced around at the gallery. It was filled with well-known actors, artists, people dressed up and sipping wine. And I was sitting next to Jesus. Who got his numbers wrong.

"See this? Jesus gave me his number-- 888 and so I am the Prince of Peace."

Of course you are. And Jesus writes with a Sharpie.

After texting my friend Adam (who burst out laughing and spilled his wine)in the front row that he was missing out on sitting next to the Messiah, the guy continued.

"I will probably get sent a nice jet instead of a fiery chariot. And you know I will be die mos' powerful man, as the Prince of Peace, and you could be die mos' powerful, richest woman if you wanted to get in on this."

Channeling Bernie Madoff.

"Well," I said, engaging a lunatic because that's what you should always do when they start rambling, "I believe the Prince of Peace has already come."

"Vel I am the MILLENNIUM Prince of Peace," he countered.

And you're just about nine years off....

"So...are you a part of the theater group?" I asked, wondering if the whole place was going to descend into some sort of religious cult schizophrenia-induced nonsense.

"No I just came in off of the street."

"I hear an accent. Where are you from originally?" I asked.

"Syria," he responded with his eyes sorta rolling back in his head. (I am sure he was looking for something back there.)

And just as he said that the play began to start and I shut up....wondering how I always end up with a little crazy to keep me company.